Why is it so wrong to fall in love???

You can not help who you love. That is a fact. What makes this wrong is that you are conflicted in your mind, heart, and situation. You have a wife and children and by spending time with a woman that isn't your wife you have put your heart and mind in two seperate places. To be fair to both women and your children, yo should sieze contact with the other woman. If you do that and you feel no love for your wife or even respect then you can look at ending the marriage. To further this, it does not sound like you are asking how to handle this situation, but wheather or not it is acceptable. It isn't because there are more lives at stake here than your wife and girlfriend. There are children at risk. They are tender and need to know that they are loved, wanted, and safe. If an affair were to occur the temperment of the home would change and so would their safety net. You said that you would be walking away from your heart if you were to leave the other woman alone. Are your children not your heart and soul? They should be. Their lives should be more important to you than any woman. They should more important to you than your wife. To sacrifice your childrens happines for a woman that is not their mother and has not earned the right to your heart by bearing your children is wrong. It is also wrong to sacrifice their happiness for selfish reasons. You sound as if you are not miserable but not completely content. That will go away and improve. By you even thinking of leaving your wife for another woman in this type of situation is completely out of line. It is disrespectful and cruel. I could be wrong about how you feel in your marriage but I am only going off of what you have written.